Tuesday, October 24, 2023

Live and Learn: Lesson 1 - Don't let Circumstances Control You.

 "Don't let circumstances  control you. You change your circumstances. "

-Jackie Chan

I don't know how to begin this post, but I know I need to change how I live my life. I have always tried to find a way to help me live happily and fulfilled. I have read many books and online articles and even practiced spirituality, like joining a meditation retreat. However, sometimes, I find myself feeling trapped in unhealthy emotions. 

Living in the Social Media Era, it's hard to stay focused and positive; every day, we are bombarded by tons of information that often is based on bias. People will always take sides if it is from someone or something they support; even though what is said doesn't seem right, they still try to support the person who posts. 

On the contrary, even though it is based on the truth and makes sense if the post is written by someone they don't like, they still find a reason to criticize. In most of the comments, two sides of readers will be arguing. They even say mean things to each other. There is always a hidden agenda behind the news and social media posts. 

I am overwhelmed whenever I read news or articles because sometimes I don't know whether they tell the truth. I have friends who have become long-term friends for a long time, but their friendships have ended because of different political beliefs.  

Sometimes, I can't stay composure and peaceful because of the people surrounding me. At work, I have to deal with some co-workers and customers who are difficult. And when I return to my place, I have to deal with noisy neighbors. 

We live in a condo where we can't avoid hearing our next-door neighbor. On my day-offs, I love spending time on a patio reading books and writing blog posts, but I can't concentrate because my neighbors downstairs are noisy. Sometimes, I almost yell at them! If I were still my old version, I would have yelled at them or even said mean words.  

One day, I realized that I can't change or control external situations or other people's behaviors, but what I can do is change myself. We can't avoid being involved in unpleasant situations unless we live alone in the woods or cave, disconnecting from the world. 

And whenever I know I have lost myself to the furious and hectic external world, I will return to my inner world. I have learned to be honest about my feelings by adopting one of the Buddha's teachings that teaches you to be aware of your thoughts. 

When you suffer from your untrained mind, you need to train your mind to be more positive. When you think positively, it helps broaden your perspective. I have learned that I am unhappy because I let the outside world control me. And when I can accept what causes me unhappiness, I can let it go. I can't control what happens, but can choose how to respond. 


I will live and learn every day and be a better person than I was yesterday. I know I am imperfect and sometimes make mistakes because I am a work in process. And that's all a lesson I learned today. 

Thank you for reading my post. 

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